Connection over control
Through parenting education training, a teacher in Kathmandu learns to appreciate the power of listening and building a supportive environment to help children thrive
Kathmandu, Nepal: Teacher Minju Shova Chitrakar always saw herself as a leader. She was the one who set the rules, gave instructions, and expected both her students and their parents to follow. That was leadership, at least, that’s what she believed. But she never expected a training programme to change the way she saw herself, including her role as a parent.
Minju had joined a Training of Facilitators for the Parenting Education National Package, developed by the Ministry of Education, Science and Technology’s Center for Education and Human Resource Development (CEHRD) with support from UNICEF.
While Minju thought it would be an opportunity to expand her knowledge, she didn’t anticipate how deeply it would challenge her understanding of leadership — not just at school but at home, too.
One evening, during a family gathering, she recalls insisting that her child perform a dance in front of guests. When her child hesitated, Minju, frustrated, warned that they would not be allowed to participate in future school performances. She thought she was being encouraging. Instead, she watched her child break into tears.
Later that night, she replayed the moment in her mind. Through the lens of her parenting education training, she saw it differently. She had been so focused on control that she had forgotten to listen. The realization hit hard. She had been doing the same with the parents at her school — telling them what to do, expecting compliance, without truly understanding their perspectives.
That moment changed everything. Minju decided to shift from control to connection, both as a mother and as a leader. She began listening more to her child, to parents, to teachers. She stopped giving orders and started having conversations.
At school, this shift was apparent. Minju started to faciltate parenting education sessions, creating spaces for discussion and reflection. Parents shared their challenges, explored solutions, and felt heard. Instead of seeing Minju as an authority figure, they began to trust her as a mentor. They sought her advice, confided in her, and worked with her to create a supportive environment for their children.
Along with the parents, Minju felt herself change too. She became more patient, more empathetic. She learned that leadership isn’t about knowing all the answers but about creating a space where others feel safe to grow. And the impact rippled outward. Teachers adopted a more nurturing approach. Students felt more supported. The school culture began to shift.
Looking ahead, Minju is committed to making parenting education a core part of her school’s approach. She envisions a future where parents, teachers and school leaders work as partners to raise confident, happy children.
Her biggest lesson? It’s not about control — it’s about connection.
