Mental health and well-being: Switching the conversation
Tips on overcoming mental health stigma
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It’s totally normal for kids, teens, and adults to go through tough times with their mental health and well-being at different points in their lives. Yet, it’s not always easy to speak about these problems. Sometimes people feel ashamed to share their feelings, they are afraid to be judged and viewed as “weak” or “crazy”. This can make one feel very isolated and might even lead to a worsening of mental health problems. Another name for these negative and unfair beliefs about mental health problems is stigma.
Stigma is not only incorrect and unfair, but it can also be dangerous. It can stand in the way of individuals seeking support when they need it.
Let’s break the stigma around mental health, one question at a time. We need to create a culture where everyone feels comfortable talking about emotions and seeking help, no matter their age. For a healthier life for all kids, teens, and their families, let’s change the way we talk about it. If you ask, “How are you?”, wait for the answer and really mean it. Let’s not use “How are you” as a casual conversation starter.
"Are you okay?"
"How are you really feeling?"
"What’s on your mind?"
How to talk to a friend or family member who is sad or anxious without reinforcing stereotypes
It is normal to feel that you don't know what to do or say when someone tells you that they are experiencing difficult thoughts and feelings. You do not need any special training to show you care about them. Most times, being there and doing little things can be very helpful.
Sometimes, talking isn’t enough, and you might need to encourage them to speak to a trusted adult like a parent, teacher, or school psychologist.
Here are some tips on how to talk to someone who’s struggling:
- Listen without judgment. Just being available to listen to someone express how they are feeling can be soothing in itself. If it is difficult for them to speak, tell them that you are there whenever they feel comfortable to share what they are going through. Let them share their feelings when they are ready without interrupting or judging.
- Try not to make assumptions. Your perspective might be useful to your friend or family but try not to assume that you already know what may have caused their feelings or what will help.
- Avoid stereotypes. Don’t use phrases that reinforce negative stereotypes about mental health.
- Be supportive. Show that you care and are there for them. If you can, genuinely reassure them that they are not alone and that you will be there to help.
- Encourage professional help, if needed. If needed, gently suggest they talk to a mental health professional – a school psychologist is a good start.
- Stay patient. You might be tempted to keep asking questions to know more about their thoughts and feelings or want them to get help quickly. Be patient, and allow them to take their time to set the pace for seeking support themselves. Remember, it’s okay to feel unsure about what to say. Just being there for them can make a big difference. However, it is sometimes hard to choose the right words.
Here are some ways you can start a conversation to let your loved ones know that you are there for them:
- "I’m checking in as you’ve been on my mind lately and I hope everything is OK. Let’s talk when you’re free, I love to catch up!"
- "How are you, really? Sometimes I feel a bit overwhelmed, is it the same for you?"
- "What a year, right? How are you holding up? It has been a strange one for me, that’s for sure."
When you’re talking to someone who’s going through a tough time, some words might come off too strong. Here are some suggestions for what words to use and what to avoid:
- Instead of saying "You're overthinking." try saying "What's making you feel this way?"
- Instead of "You worry too much." try "I understand why you would feel this way."
- Instead of "It is not a big deal, you have everything." try "How can I help you?"
According to a UReport poll stigma and fear of judgment play a role in reducing adolescents' participation and utilization of mental health services in North Macedonia.
Busting myths about mental health can help break the stigma and create a supportive environment where everyone feels comfortable seeking help when they need it. See some of the common misconceptions about mental health.
Listen carefully to what your friend is trying to tell you without reinforcing stereotypes:
- Stereotype: "You're just being lazy!" Reality: They might be feeling too sad or worried to do anything.
- Stereotype: "You just want attention!" Reality: They might not be feeling okay.
- Stereotype: "You don't care about school!" Reality: They need help, and they need to take a break.
