"Children are taught to achieve, win, compete, but they don’t know how to cooperate"

"A new student came to our class," says Sasha, an 11th grade pupil. "The other kids were quite aggressive at first: they were making fun of his appearance and clothes, of how he was answering the teachers' questions. The homeroom teacher decided to ask the school mediation* service to help solve the conflict."

*Mediation – a dispute resolution technique, negotiations with the participation of a neutral party – a specialist working at the junction of law and psychology.

Sasha is a volunteer working for the school mediation service at school No.14 in Mozyr. Together with other volunteers, who have gone through special training, as well as with teachers, psychologists and professional mediators they help solve the pupils' conflicts in a peaceful way. Teachers and psychologists try not to interfere with the children's disputes, they come to the aid only in difficult situations or when there is a conflict between children and adults (teachers, parents, school administration).

"Children are taught to achieve, win, compete, but they don’t know how to cooperate," Sasha shares her observations with other mediators and volunteers from all over the country during the V Mediation of the Future Festival for school children and students that was held in early May. It brought together about 300 children and adolescents who are engaged in mediation in their schools. They shared their experience with each other, were able to learn more about mediation from professionals at round tables and workshops, and strengthened their mediation skills by discussing cases with experienced mediators.

The first school mediation services appeared in 2015: the Mediation and Law Center launched a project to develop school mediation in Belarus. In 2016, 22 educational institutions (schools, gymnasiums and a vocational school) joined the project. In 2022, there are already about 80 of them.

In 2018, the Mediation and Law Center, together with its partners, held the first festival of school mediation. Since 2019, the United Nations Children's Fund (UNICEF) in Belarus has become a partner of the festival. About 1,500 children have participated in the festival since it was first launched. These children became leaders in their schools and promoted the values of mutual respect and constructive dispute resolution.

"The festival allows all of us to come together and see what we can do to make the school environment safer and friendlier. UNICEF Belarus believes that school mediation can help children and adolescents, teachers and parents achieve this goal. We look forward to continuing working with the government, the NGO partners, and you (children – ed.) to move forward," said Gabriella Akimova, UNICEF Deputy Representative in Belarus.

We have collected the most interesting stories and observations shared by school children

Find out more about mediation through the eyes of children and adolescents

Alexandra Gugleva, 11th grade, school No.14 in Mozyr:

"We were able to handle the bullying of the new boy. We signed a peace agreement that suited both sides. What did we agree on? Children were making fun of him because of his appearance and communication style. Therefore, we came to a joint decision that we needed to get to know our classmate better: to understand what is "inside" and not "outside" of him. During the mediation process, they just got to know each other better – and the conflict was settled."

Daria Mironovich, gymnasium No.17 in Minsk

"It is difficult to get out of conflict situations on your own, especially for a minor. It is not easy to cope with the consequences, to realize and admit one's guilt, to forgive. To do it both children and adults need professional help from a person who is not interested in the conflict."

Maria Moisak, 8th grade, school No.93 in Minsk:

"The children and adolescents who contact us say that parents often tell them 'not to be a punching bag, to fight back as much as possible and to defend one's position till the end, to be the first one'. Such an attitude often becomes the reason for fights and multi-level conflicts. Most often, we encounter such attitudes among pupils in 5-8th grades. At this age, children rely on the opinion of their parents, consider it true and correct. Basically if the parents tell them to act aggressively, they will do it. Even when these children voluntarily come to mediation, these attitudes slow down the process very much. Such children are often set to fight, not to cooperate. Feelings of guilt are mixed with feelings of resentment for not being able to stand up for themselves."

Vladislav Rogach, 8th grade, school No.30 in Minsk:

"Now I'm in 8th grade. When I was in the 6th grade, I had a conflict with a classmate. He provoked me, I could not hold back and hit him so hard that he ended up in a hospital. After that, the social service offered us to mediate. Then I learned that our school has a service that helps guys like me build relationships. The mediators talked to us in a friendly way and helped to find a solution.

"I thought back then: 'It’s great that there is such a service in our school!' I became interested in it. And recently I myself have become a mediator. I have changed, I have become more stress-resistant, I do not react to provocations, I am learning to listen to and hear other people."

Yuliana Uss, school No.148 in Minsk

"After studying mediation, a girl who cried because of humiliation and was afraid to communicate with people turned into a more open and sociable person and found new friends. This girl is me. I am convinced that mediation can really help anyone who gives it at least a bit of time."

If you want to have a mediation service in your school too

• You can call: (017) 257 57 02, (029) 688 10 13,
• or e-mail us at: [email protected].