Return to the Nest: A Story of Home, Belonging and Foster Care

A Home Where Everyone Grows Together

In an apartment in Sarajevo, the days unfold with school bags by the door, drawings scattered across the table, children’s laughter and evening routines slowly becoming part of a shared life. At first glance, it looks like many other family homes. But behind it is a slightly different story, a story about how much it means for children to grow up in a safe, warm and supportive family environment.

Two years ago, Elma and Asmir opened their home to four children – brothers and sisters who had grown up without parental care and spent their early years in residential care. Their story shows how foster care can change a child’s life, while also transforming the life of an entire family.

They first heard about foster care almost by chance, through one of Asmir’s colleagues at work who was also a foster parent. That conversation was enough for Elma and Asmir to begin seriously thinking about the possibility, and very soon they decided to take that step themselves.

After training and the formal assessment process, four children arrived in their home: *Sara, *Izo, Aja* and Ado*. Keeping siblings together whenever possible is one of the core principles of child protection, and this family was able to offer them that chance.

The First Days in a New Home

The first day was not easy. Ado, the oldest, cried and wanted to return to the institution. Before joining the foster family, the children had spent some time apart, and the change was especially hard for him.

While Ado was crying, Izo seized the moment. He turned to Asmir and asked, “If Ado goes back, can I have his toys?”

Asmir still remembers that moment with a smile. In that child’s sentence, spoken through tears and uncertainty, there was already the beginning of trust and closeness between them.

After just one conversation with Ado, the director of the Centre for Social Work managed to calm him and help him feel safe again.

Today, two years later, the children call Elma “mama” and Asmir “babo”, not because they were told to, but because that is how they feel.

How a Home Became a Family

When Elma and Asmir decided to become foster parents, they did not tell their extended family right away. They waited until the children had truly arrived.

“We knew there would be questions and surprise,” Elma says. “We didn’t want to say anything until it was real.”

The hardest part was for Elma’s mother, the grandmother the children now adore. It was not that she disagreed with their decision , she was hurt that they had not told her sooner. When she heard the news, she did not speak to Elma for a month. But every day, she still came to look after the children.

“She was upset, but she still came to cook lunch and make sure everyone was fed,” Elma says with a laugh. Today, the grandmother is an inseparable part of the family. As she says, “When one child goes on a school trip, you can feel the emptiness in the apartment. It feels strange when someone is missing.”

Support That Makes a Difference

Both Elma and Asmir work. When the children arrived, they needed time to adjust, to one another, to school and to new routines. Yet the law in Bosnia and Herzegovina does not provide parental leave for foster parents. Elma’s employer was understanding, and she was granted sick leave instead.

“It wasn’t parental leave,” Elma says. “But it helped. The question is: what about foster parents who don’t have that kind of understanding at work?”

This family’s experience shows how important support is in the first months of foster care, from professional guidance to flexibility in the workplace. When systems respond in time, children and foster families can build a sense of safety and trust more easily. 

A Bird Returned to the Nest

Elma and Asmir completed foster care training, an important step in assessing whether a family is ready to respond to a child’s needs. Good preparation helps future foster parents understand their role, children’s rights and the support they can expect from the system.

“That is the first filter,” Asmir explains. “People do not always understand that a child in foster care may return to their biological family if the situation improves there. And that foster care often ends when a child turns 18. Some find that difficult.”

Elma adds, “It is the same with biological children. They grow up and leave too.”

The children are cheerful, curious and open. They talk a lot, play, hug and effortlessly show how deeply they have grown attached to their new home.

Aja proudly shows her drawings and neatly kept school notebooks, telling you who already knows how to swim, who is still learning, and how they help their mother and father with everyday chores.

Sara is both gentle and organised, always ready with an answer and a smile. She loves dressing up, pretty dresses and jewelry. In one lovely detail of family life, her mother even makes earrings for her out of cherries.

Izo loves talking about the animals they saw in the countryside and at the zoo, especially one moment that left a strong impression on him.

“We were walking in the forest with dad,” Izo said, eyes wide. “He found a tiny bird that had fallen from its nest, so he climbed the tree and put it back.”

In that simple story lies so much of what children need most: safety, belonging and the feeling of being brought back into a family environment.

A Place at School, A Place in the Community

Elma says she was most worried about how the children would be received at school. She feared discrimination, teasing and everything children can face when they are seen as different.But there was no reason to worry.

The children settled in well at school and among their peers, showing how important supportive communities, inclusive schools and stigma-free environments are for a child’s development and sense of belonging.

“In the end,” Elma says, “children only know whether someone loves them. The rest does not matter to them.”

Why Foster Care Changes Lives

UNICEF in Bosnia and Herzegovina advocates for every child to have the opportunity to grow up in a family, with the support that children and foster carers need. When that is not possible within a child’s biological family, foster care can provide the safety, continuity and sense of belonging children need to grow and thrive.

Stories like this remind us that foster care is not only a form of protection – it is an opportunity for a child to feel safety, closeness and the healing power of everyday family life again.

These stories do not happen by chance. They are the result of systemic work, stronger family support services and a shared commitment to ensuring that institutionalisation is not the answer. In Bosnia and Herzegovina, UNICEF, with the support of the European Union and in partnership with institutions and other actors, is helping to prevent family separation, strengthen foster care and support children growing up in their communities.

Because every child needs an embrace to return to, a place where they belong and a family, they can call their own.

If you would like to learn more about foster care, please contact your local centre for social work and find out how you can provide a home for a child who needs one.