Adolescent girls and boys: Sometimes they tell us to keep quiet, and sometimes they ask us questions

  "The problem is that we don't talk about our feelings at school. We talk about bullying and other problems, but no one has asked us how we feel about these issues. It is important that we talk about it, many children are very withdrawn, no one talks about their true feelings. Although it is a private topic, I would like to hear the opinions of the other children, to see how they cope with all this," says Merjem, an eighth-grade student at the 5th October elementary school from Sanski Most. 

Merjem is one of the participants in the workshop "Mom, Dad and I - all in the same shoes" on family relationships. The workshop was realized as part of the teaching process within the school, and was created through the UNICEF program for adolescent girls whose goal is to strengthen the self-confidence of adolescent girls and boys and their ability to identify violations of children's rights, seek support services, report abuse and understand what are the harmful social norms and how to react to them. 

 At the workshop, the students agreed that more understanding and discussion is needed when there is a conflict in the family. "Sometimes I'm silent, sometimes I talk. Sometimes they tell me - keep quiet, and sometimes they say - come on! We should talk more with parents, let them say why they are angry, we don't understand them, and what types of stress they are going through," says Din. 

 The director of the school and pedagogue, Dževida Hasić, talked to the students about different situations when there is a conflict in the family, what kind of emotions they felt, how they reacted. 

 Many say that they talk to a certain limit, as long as they are allowed to, and that they mostly remain silent and agree that communication would be much better if everyone were calmer. "We need to distance ourselves a bit until the situation calms down. We won't achieve anything with silence, the parents will forget about the matter, and we won't solve anything permanently if we don't talk," says Merjem. 

The environment in which children and adolescents grow up shapes their well-being and development. Early negative experiences in homes, schools or digital spaces, such as exposure to violence, mental health issues of a parent or other caregiver, bullying and poverty, increases the risk of mental disorders, the World Health Organization (WHO) points out. 

 Mental health conditions, such as childhood epilepsy, developmental disabilities, depression, anxiety and behavioural disorders, are major causes of illness and disability among young people. Worldwide, 10% of children and adolescents suffer from a mental disorder, but most of them do not seek help or receive care. 

 According to WHO data, suicide is the fourth leading cause of death among 15-19 year olds. The consequences of not dealing with the mental health and psychosocial development of children and adolescents extend into adulthood and limit opportunities for a fulfilling life. 

Workshops like this one in Sanski Most are held as a part of the homeroom classes and were prepared after extensive consultations that UNICEF's partner organization Genesis conducted in 18 schools in the Una-Sana Canton and Canton 10. 

 "One homeroom class that children have once a week is not enough. The students' awareness that they can ask for help themselves has not yet been developed. Also, parents have not reached the level where they can ask for help themselves, mostly this happens when the school recommends it. We have to work on developing awareness that as soon as parents and teachers notice a problem, we all react together immediately," Dževida Hasić pointed out , adding that, although they have good cooperation with the Center for Mental Health, in small communities like Sanski Most there is a lack of professional staff. 

 A similar workshop was held in the homeroom class at the First Elementary School in Bosanska Krupa, entitled "My life is like a river."  Students of the ninth grade talked and creatively presented obstacles and enabling factors in their lives, from their own surroundings.  

"I am happy that workshops like this are held, where we can show our creativity and express our opinions and feelings. This is a good way to talk about problems. It's not easy to talk, but I like that it's like this, through the class, because through this activity, I've also seen some other people's problems, how similar we really are, even though we belong to different groups at school." says Emma. 

 Educator Mersad Bajrić says that male and female students are most interested in the topics of mental health, anxiety, stress, emotions, but also violence.   

"I tried to change the perception that the pedagogue is there to punish them. I always emphasize to students that they can come to me for help, advice, and conversation. I am here when something bothers them and they have no one to turn to. My goal is to help them. The biggest challenge is to gain trust, to openly say everything they have. Also, to understand that any problem they have is not unsolvable, that help is available," Bajrić points out. 

 Building on previous work in schools, UNICEF expanded its activities on the promotion of children's rights, access to justice and support services in schools through the program for adolescent girls. 

"Adolescence is a unique stage in the development of each person's personality. In this period, the foundations are laid for the further personality development, the ways we are making decisions, and for our communication with the world around us. Adolescents must be active members of our societies and must be part of processes relevant to them. Therefore, UNICEF's approach to the implementation of the Strategy for adolescent girls is the joint creation of content and methods for working with adolescents, to discuss important topics with them in an adequate, interesting and comprehensible manner, with the aim of contributing to the creation of an equal society." said Veronika Vashchenko, representative of UNICEF in Bosnia and Herzegovina. 

 Based on feedback from adolescents about the topics and problems they want to discuss in schools, a “Praktikum” for teachers was developed to guide them in the implementation of the necessary workshops. The first workshops are currently being held in 68 schools in Bosnia and Herzegovina, with the aim of later expanding to other schools.