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Talking with children about disasters

Today, during catastrophic humanitarian disasters like the recent earthquake in Haiti, children are exposed to news, discussion and visual images of the events. You can help the children in your life cope with their feelings, feel safe and even respond with positive actions:

1. Start a conversation.

§ Invite conversation by asking, “Have you heard anything about a country called Haiti?” or "How do you feel about what is happening in Haiti?" If the child clearly isn’t interested in talking about it, then don’t push it.

§ Let the child’s concerns guide the discussion. Keep your responses factual, brief and simple. Give no more information than is asked for.

§ Acknowledge their feelings, saying things like, "I know this is scary". Reassure the child that they are safe, and discuss how the victims of the disaster are getting help.

§ If you can't answer their questions, use it as an opportunity to explore the answers together. Websites of international relief organisations, like UNICEF, can be great sources of information.

2. Help the child to feel personally safe.

§ Avoid viewing disturbing news coverage in front of the children, especially those under the age of 10. Young children may not distinguish between images on screen and their own personal reality – they may believe that they are in imminent danger of an earthquake.

§ If it is appropriate for the child to view media coverage of the events, watch it with the child and talk about it afterward. Use it as an opening for discussion: "How do you feel about what is happening in Haiti?"

§ Children will pick up on your own response, so carefully think about how you react to news and information about the disaster – they need to know you are calm and in control.

§ Try to balance the horrific or frightening information children get from the news media with positive stories, such as the acts of bravery, generosity and kindness of ordinary people caught in the disaster, and the actions of organisations like UNICEF and its partners in bringing relief to those affected. Remind the child of the many people who take care of others, like police officers, doctors and nurses.

3. Help the child take constructive action.

§ One way to help children deal constructively with their feelings is to give them an opportunity to contribute to relief and recovery. Discuss with the child what they or your family can do to help, including raising funds at school or with a club or team, making a donation, and telling friends and family how they too can help.

4. Respond to changes in behaviour.

§ Some children have more trouble than others coming to terms with death and suffering. In these situations, it might be best to ask for help from social workers and psychologists.

EXPLAINING EVENTS IN HAITI

1. As you might already know, it can be difficult to explain the events of a disaster like the earthquake in Haiti to the children in your life. Although you can clearly explain the basics of the earthquake and the relief efforts, you might want to wait for follow-up questions from the child before divulging too much information that could frighten or upset them.

2. For young children… start by explaining that the ground shook in a town that’s very far away, and some of those houses fell down. Now, there are many people helping the families there. Neighbours are helping neighbours and workers are helping take care of people who are hurt, providing food, water and shelter. People from all over the world are sending help so there will be enough supplies to help everyone. It will take some time, but the help will continue until people have homes to live in and kids can go to school and things are normal again.

3. For older children… explain that some parts of the world are prone to environmental disasters such as hurricanes, floods or earthquakes. These can cause widespread destruction in poorer areas of the world where there is overcrowding and extreme poverty. Poorer countries like Haiti do not always have some of the protections more developed countries like Malaysia have, so there is much less likelihood of so much suffering and destruction happening here in Malaysia.

Source: UNICEF Canada

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